"KNOW YO' MAN" COPYRIGHT JEFF ARTIS AND jeffartis.com, 2010. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED.
LADIES, HERE ARE SOME RULES YOU NEED TO KNOW ABOUT MEN.
10 THINGS TO ALWAYS REMEMBER ABOUT MEN
1. Men want 4 things, sex, money, food and sex. (Yes, I listed sex twice.)
2. Never tell a man you love him until he tells you first, especially if you are a single parent.
3. The first time a man puts his hands on you in anger, leave and NEVER come back. Some things don't deserve a second chance.
4. Men are like puppies. Sometimes you've got to train them.
5. If a man doesn't have a healthy relationship with his mother, he CAN'T have a healthy relationship with you.
6. Never, never, never let a man control your money.
7. You can't change a man. Don't even try.
8. Date the "Bad Boys," but, marry the "Nice Guys."
9. If you're looking for fireworks, go to an amusement park. Good relationships are slow and steady.
10. If you're looking for unconditional love, buy a puppy. A man can't complete you. Only you can complete you.
ONE EXTRA RULE. 11. Life is short. Sometimes being alone is better than being with a man who is a knucklehead. (Why waste your precious time messing with some fool who is not good for you?)
Remember these simple rules and you'll be a very happy lady.
JEFF
LOVE YOURSELF!
This might sound crazy. But I'm going to tell you. It's o.k. to like yourself. It's o.k. to love yourself. It's o.k. to be your own best friend. Sounds crazy, right? Sounds like someone who is self center, right? Sounds like someone with a big ego, right? Let me break it down to you.
Successful people have confidence. Successful people don't let anyone keep them from achieving their goals. Successful people keep on keeping on when their family, their friends, and the people they respect tell them, "You can't do that." Successful people keep on keeping on when someone tells them, "That's the dumbest thing I've ever heard." Successful people keep on keeping on when someone tells them, "That's so stupid." Successful people keep on keeping on when someone asks them, "What makes you so special that you think you can do that?" Successful people keep on keeping on in spite of people telling them that they are going to fail.
It's nice when you have a role model or a mentor that can guide and help you achieve our dreams. But, what happens when there are no role models around? What happens when there is no one around to help guide you to your dreams? What happens when all you hear are negative comments as you try to achieve your dreams?
In situations like this, you have to depend on yourself. You will have to like yourself. You will have to love yourself. You will have to be your own best friend. You will have to tell yourself that you can do it in spite of what others are saying about you. That's what successful people do.
The world is full of haters. The world is full of people who don't want you to be successful. The world is full of people who enjoy watching other people fail. The world is full of people who will do anything and everything they can to make people fail. I wish the world wasn't like this, but, it is. And when things get ugly, when people tell you that you are dumb, you are stupid, you are ugly, you are fat, or you don't have the skills do something, you need to keep on keeping on. You need to tell yourself, "Hey, I can do this and I'm going to prove people wrong."
Like yourself. Love yourself. Be you own best friend. Never let anyone tell you that you can't achieve your dreams. It all starts with you. It's alright to look at yourself in the mirror and tell yourself, "I'm o.k. I'm gonna make this happen."
JEFF
lilmochaswte asks: 1) Why do people always feel they have to play the race card? 2) What do you do when a guy takes your virginity and doesn't call you back?
On the first question, you've go to understand that racism is mostly about power. A person uses racism or plays the race card to make themselves feel important and to make the other person feel insignificant. Usually, a person who uses racism is a person who is insecure, who has a low opinion of themselves, who feels the need to make other people bad so they can make themselves feel good and important. I'd even say that a person who uses racism doesn't like themselves very much, if at all.
What's the best way to deal with racism? By not letting a racist get to you. A racist wants confrontation. A racist wants a reaction. If you don't react, that will drive a racist crazy. If someone says something out of the way to you, calmly say, "I don't appreciate what you just said. You really need to be a better human being." Then walk away. You might hear some off the wall comment as you walk away, but, you'll be walking away holding the upper hand. You will have won.
On the second question, all I've got to say is young boys can be real jackasses. I hate to say this, but, if you give a guy your virginity and he doesn't call back, there's not much you can do. A lot of guys could care less how a girl feels about giving up her virginity. These guys are only interested in having sex and they couldn't care less about a girl's feelings. A lot of guys make it a game taking someone's virginity. These guys will tell a girl everything a girl wants to hear, have sex with her and then brag to his friends about how he played the girl to take her virginity. That's how a lot of guys operate.
When it comes to having sex, I always ask young girls what's the rush? If a guy is truly interested in you, if a guy truly cares for you, if a guy really loves you, having sex isn't that important. I'll be honest with you. If a guy is putting pressure on a girl to have sex, that girl needs to dump him and find someone else. Why? If a guy is putting pressure on a girl to have sex, that guy is more interested in having sex than he is interested in the girl. And as old fashioned as it seems, waiting until you are married to have sex isn't too bad. It's better than giving your virginity to some jerk who really doesn't care about you.
One other thing, don't fall for the, "If you love me you'll sleep with me," line. If a guy tells you this, he's playing you. In fact, he's playing you big time. Now, there are some nice guys out there. They are hard to find, but, they are out there. And when you find this guy, you'll forget all about the jerk that didn't you call back.
JEFF
TO THE LADIES
So many young ladies have written to ask, "What's up with my man?"
Ladies, let me give it to you straight. There are two types of males, those who are Little Boys and those who are Men. What do I mean? Little Boys are males who think a relationship is a one-way street; theirs. Little Boys want a woman to do two things for them; take care of them like their Momma and have sex with them often, with no questions asked. Little Boys are playas. Little Boys are selfish. Little Boys think of no one but themselves. Little Boys are only concerned about your wants and needs as long as your wants and needs don't conflict with their wants and needs. Little Boys will tell you that they love you. But, the love a Little Boy has for you will never be greater than the love a Little Boy has for himself. And if you are in a relationship with a Little Boy, drama of all types will become your new best friend.
Now, a Man is just the opposite of a Little Boy. Men are males who understand that a relationship is a two-way street, that a relationship is about give and take. For example, a Man may want to watch the game on Sunday, but there are times when a Man will change his plans if it means making you happy. Men are not selfish. Men respect women. Men respect relationships. Men respect you. Men are about "us," not "me."
A Man is not a playa. A Man isn't afraid to tell another woman, "Baby, you look good. But, I'm in a relationship right now and I can't do that to my lady." Little Boys on the other hand will tell another woman, "Hey, Baby. You look good. Yeah, I'm in a relationship, but if she don't start treating me right soon, I'm gone."
I'm gonna tell you ladies something. If you are in a relationship with a Little Boy, kick that fool to the curb ASAP. You won't regret it. Love, not drama, should be your best friend in a relationship. And you'll only get love with a Man. A Little Boy doesn't even know what love is. A Man might be hard to find at times. But, they are out there.